Leopard lace dress? YES!

Real life is pretty much draining me these days. I’m running from here to there to everywhere at once, and I’ve been a bit down from all the buzzin’. Apart from that, I’m yet again experiencing a phase of blog puberty. This time it’s all about the expectations people seem to have of you when they hear the word “Blogger”. For one, there’s been a bit of a “discussion” going on here in Belgium about what a blogger is, is not and could be. A columnist called out to bloggers pretty much labeling them ignorant and dumb. That there is my interpretation of what the columnist wrote, and it’s a bit large, but I don’t really want to go into my whole opinion on that column-thing. But the column did strike a cord. Is that how people see me too? Do people really think I’m all pretty on the inside but brainless in the head? Heck… That was not the plan! It took me a moment to get over those thoughts again and realize that I don’t claim front row seats at shows, that I don’t actively fish for sponsorings and that I don’t write my blog as if I was a renowned fashion journalist. Which seemed to have been the reason why the column that started my chain of thoughts was written. So really, I don’t think I’m a threat to people who are in it to win it. Blog puberty phase 1 passed. 

Ready for phase two? Yesterday I opened an email from a company and they asked me for my press kit. Wu-wu-what? Seriously. I had to Google that. And on my Google search I ended up on, how could I not, IFB. And they threw even more alien words at me. Brand strategies, press kits, reader stats, rate cards… . I just got hit with the overwhelming feeling of killing this blog. I don’t know guys. It’s just… I feel dumb right now? Am I the only one here who didn’t know what a press kit was until about 5 minutes ago? Apparently, it’s a list of all the times you were featured in magazines and on websites. Two years of blogging here and I haven’t been featured once. Now I feel bad because someone asked for my press kit and I don’t have one. The company lady and I continued mailing for a few hours. She asked about my rate card for a sponsored post. My what? How am I supposed to know how much you should pay me? It still feels weird to take money for my blog. I never got paid when I was in drawing school? Oh, now you want to know my stats to see how much you think I’m worth. Okay. Here they are. An average of 200 sweet ladies and gents a day. That’s about 5000 pageviews a month. What do you mean “is that it“? Yes, it is. Guess it’s because I’ve never been featured anywhere. You guess so too? Why, we do agree on something then! If I have a brand strategy to grow my readership? Uhm… no? Now you want to know why I don’t? Because I don’t. I never thought about it. To me, 200 people coming here reading and looking at my oftentimes awful grammar everyday, is a really big number. No emails were further exchanged. 

Heck, I am mad at myself right now. I feel lost and I am annoyed. Highly annoyed, by all the expectations people have. I know that maybe the company people were just looking for their best chance to visualize their brand, and maybe they were even trying to help me so that I would have these things ready for when someone else asks for anything in the future. But gosh, why does everything always seem to have to be so streamlined, so planned, so advised. 

I would love to pump in some extra kicks and magically get extra time to attend the one event per month I get invited for. But truth is, I am just a young girl who wanted a blog. Who wanted to write in English to better her language skills. Who wanted to meet people. Who wanted to have fun with clothes, how trivial that may sound. I live in a nowhere town, go to college in a nowhere city. I have no background in marketing, nor do I have interest in it. Can’t I just be silly little me here and not have to worry about all these crazy terms? Or will I have to adjust to this marketing / branding high speed train… Oh *sigh* 

PS: whenever I try to upload photos to blogger they get blurred and the colors fade. It seems to be the case since I started using Lightroom. Has anyone else had these problems? 

Wearing a J.crew navy lace dress • a WE cardigan I bought a few years ago • shoes that look like I don’t have feet (brandless)  and a  Swatch watch my mom and grandmother gave me for Christmas 2012

post signature



  1. 8 April 2013 / 17:20

    You just keep doing your thing girl! I for one think your English is amazing and please don't be bothered with expectations, you just make you own!
    It's a blog right, so that gives you the freedom to follow your own path πŸ™‚


  2. 8 April 2013 / 17:27

    Ik denk dat je gewoon moet blijven doen waar JIJ zin in hebt. Ik denk dat het belangrijkste aan stats, readership e.d. gewoon is dat je er zelf tevreden over moet zijn. Als je geen interesse hebt om je blog uit te bouwen en een strategie uit te werken, so what? Dat maakt het voor een lezer zeker niet minder interessant om te volgen. πŸ™‚

  3. 8 April 2013 / 17:51

    I'm having an issue with the fuzziness of my pictures as well, I don't know whats up but it's been frustrating.

    Oh and just do what makes you happy, forget the rest πŸ™‚

  4. 8 April 2013 / 18:14

    Hahaha. I really liked this post. It's weird how people assume bloggers are automatically a certain type of person. There are so many different types of blogs about so many things.

    I would have had to google what a press kit is too. I've heard about it, but I would have no idea what to send someone if they asked for mine. I did one sponsored post and I have no idea why they chose my blog. They must have had the wrong stats πŸ™‚

    Popular blogs get the same amount of hits a day that I get in a whole month. I never even got comments until a few month back and I'm so excited every time I do.

  5. 8 April 2013 / 19:19

    I think you should ignore all of that press stuff and just keep doing whatever you're doing – people are reading you and obviously keep coming back for more and that's all that should matter to you if it's what you care about. Don't let it get you down.

    The most refreshing thing on the internet is people who post what they want, what they love, and don't give a shit!

    I've been checking out a lot of new blogs lately and this may just be a personal thing, but all the blogs that are clearly sponsored and geared towards making an income and getting their name out there? Those ones bored me to death.

    This is your space dude.

    Oh and I deleted my instagram a couple days ago (very long sad story) but just started up a new one, new username is bas_anything. I changed the name on my post now, thank you for that!


  6. 8 April 2013 / 19:40

    oh, i totally feel ya on this one. someone reached out to me to have me review some organic beauty products…and i was all "i would love to!" and they asked what my requirements were (uhhhh?). i said that my readers also get a discount. HA!! i had no idea. and i definitely don't have a media kit! my blog doesn't feel big enough for that yet, if i'm being honest. also i don't really have a brand or a strateg…yet. maybe eventually i will but i don't feel like i've found my niche yet. i say keep doing what you're doing, i always like reading your posts! πŸ™‚

  7. 8 April 2013 / 19:49

    I don't have a press kit either and am on my third year of blogging. I also don't have any rates because I've chosen not to accept advertisers at this point. You don't have to, Nikki. You can do whatever you want with your blog.

    Also, you look gorgeous in navy and yellow.

  8. 8 April 2013 / 20:17

    Yes, you can have a blog that is not a business. Love the dress, BTW!

  9. 8 April 2013 / 22:09

    I've been blogging for over 3 years and I still don't know what a press kit is, ha!

    Don't worry too much about it. I also get e-mails, from time to time I do ignore them if they don't interest me. I know the feeling of expectations, but don't let an e-mail bring you down. Your blog is fab and fine the way it is.

    You look lovely by the way. I heart anything lacey!



  10. 8 April 2013 / 23:21

    I don't know what any of that stuff is either. Oh well.

    Just keep doing what brings you joy and the rest will follow from there. Love your outfit…but where's the leopard?


  11. 9 April 2013 / 00:24

    Oh my dear, I love this post.
    First of all, don't let all these crazy things get in the way of your blog. Remember why you started blogging in the first place – because you love it.

    This is why I haven't considered getting into any type of sponsorship. My blog would feel like a business. I would have an obligation to people. I don't want to be obligated. I want to write for me, and hopefully the public will like it.

    Don't feel guilty you don't have a press kit. Heck, I don't have one and I'm sure a number of bloggers out there don't either. It depends entirely on what direction you want your blog to go in.

    I would just say don't let this bother you πŸ™‚ You rock at what you do, and keep it lighthearted and fun. You don't HAVE to make it this serious if you don't want to. And if you want to? Well kudos to you either way πŸ˜€ !!

  12. 9 April 2013 / 00:38

    Hi I am just writing in to let you know your English is so good I didn't realize you were not an American or English person! You write very well πŸ™‚

  13. Anonymous
    9 April 2013 / 11:22

    Blijf gewoon trouw aan jezelf. Niet iedereen blogt met het idee om iets groots uit de grond te stampen of deals aan te gaan met sponsors. Wat ik zo leuk vind aan je blog is dat je jezelf blijft en over dagdagelijkse dingen praat die ieder meisje van twintig meemaakt. Een soort sneak peek in je dagboek. Niet mee in het commerciΓ«le stappen maakt van jou geen leeghoofd. Allesbehalve zelfs. Het maakt je uniek en zorgt ervoor dat jij er als blogger uitspringt. En mode oppervlakkig? Iedereen mag kiezen waarover hij schrijft. Niks van aantrekken!

  14. 9 April 2013 / 12:18

    First of really pretty dress!! Second ik versta je echt volkomen!!! Ik ben ook nog nooit ergens gefeatured of heb geen blog strategie! Ik vind het ook al gewoon een eer als mensen naar mijn blog komen (ook al zijn dat er geen 5000 per maand πŸ˜‰ )
    je bent goed bezig! Mensen lezen je blog graag en meer heb je niet nodig!!! Maar ik versta de "verwarring/ irritatie" rond de verwachtingen!

  15. 9 April 2013 / 12:34

    Awww, I understand that one threw you for a loop! I don't think it's stupid to ask for money for a post though- you have a lovely blog and why not make a little more ouut of it?

  16. 9 April 2013 / 12:43

    First up, really like the blue and yellow together. That dress is beautiful.

    Second, your blog is great! You don't need a press kit and a media kit and a rates card if you don't want to have one. Your blog is for you, and you get 200 people coming to read it every day as they like hearing what you have to say and looking at your lovely photos and outfits, right now. You don't have to change πŸ™‚

    And third, don't feel bad about not knowing the terms. I had a company contact me and I had to ask them what everything meant as well. I don't think they were very impressed with me not knowing, although I learnt a lot from the emails! haha. πŸ™‚

    Away From Blue

  17. 9 April 2013 / 12:49

    Dat geel staat je heel goed. Ik zou alleen blauwe schoentjes eronder dragen.

  18. 9 April 2013 / 13:05

    Leuke outfit. Je kleedje lijkt op eentje dat ik ook heb πŸ™‚ en je hebt geen kousen/legging/panty ( je weet wat ik wil bedoelen he) aan!!! je was niet de enige die dat moest opzoeken op Google. Ik heb 1 keer zo'n mail gekregen van een merk maar toen ze hoorden dat ik geen 1000 volgers had, kreeg ik geen mail meer terug. Ik blog omdat ik hetzelf wil en ook om zoals jij zei om mijn engels wat te verbeteren en niet voor gratis cadeautjes ( al zou ik geen nee zeggen moesten ze er geven πŸ˜‰ )

    xx Audrey

  19. 9 April 2013 / 13:05

    Hahaha, you are such a clever writer. Love your style! πŸ™‚ And I know how you feel. I only recently started discovering all those scary words. And then only time I was proposed to get paid for the blog post, I figured that PayPal IN payments don;t work for my country. And people who wanted the post refused to pay ay other way. And yeah, by that time I already posted an article. So it was free advertisement for them. πŸ™‚

  20. 9 April 2013 / 13:41

    Society is rough, man! Really though, I appreciate your blog. Don't let them get you down πŸ™‚

  21. 9 April 2013 / 16:25

    Mooie outfit!
    En ik zou ook helemaal niet weten wat ik moest doen als ik zo'n mailtje krijg πŸ˜€
    Gewoon doen wat het beste voelt voor jou πŸ™‚

  22. 9 April 2013 / 16:57

    No, you don't have to give in. You should keep doing what you're doing! I read a lot of blogs, but yours is one of my top 3 favorites. You are so real and that's what makes your blog great.

    You don't need to be a top dog in marketing and have a business strategy. I think because you aren't on here for that, it makes your blog stand out!

  23. 9 April 2013 / 19:18

    To begin with, you are rocking that navy/yellow combo. It looks really great on you.

    I actually really like the IFB, but then I just find it interesting how social media is changing things. If in the future I want to do sponsored stuff, maybe I'll have some background, but it is just interesting to read (of course, I say this as someone who used to teach technology to kids so…). That said, people get into blogging for many different reasons and stay in it for different reasons. Some people want make it an income or a job and some, like you, just want to blog as a hobby. Both are totally legitimate stances to take. By not being sponsored, we readers always know the clothes you buy and the opinions you express here are totally yours/your tastes and that it pretty special.

    There is no need to feel pressured for anything else. You can just email people in future and say you are not interested…and if you decide in the future maybe you are interested, well, know at least, you will have some idea of what info a company will ask for.

    It is very discouraging to think that just by knowing you are a blogger people might form certain expectations about you. Sadly most people don't even know what a blogger is around these parts (yes. I know that is weird), but I worry that if certain people know, they will react badly simply because it is unfamiliar and that could affect job hunting. But… you can't change how other people view it. You just have to decide if it is worth doing for you. πŸ™‚

    Thank you for writing so frankly on the subject.

  24. 10 April 2013 / 20:13

    Oh girl. I am with you. I fight daily with the urge to give in and try and be all about pageviews/followers. Seriously, especially since I am going into PR. I do NOT believe in being fake and all about pageviews, I NEVER want that to be me!

  25. 11 April 2013 / 20:51

    Oh I'm sorry that is all so frustrating! I know people asking me questions like that every day and I'm at a loss of what to say… I wish blogging was my full time job, but I have a lot of other stuff going on! I do sure like this dress though! gorgeous lace!


  26. 12 April 2013 / 15:14

    Gorgeous outfit. I love yellow and blue together. It's one of my favorite color combinations.

    I would love for you to stop by my blog and enter my latest giveaway. I will be picking 3 winners. πŸ™‚

  27. 13 April 2013 / 06:46

    Oh man I definitely feel you here! I know what a press kit is but have no idea how to go about creating one or how to answer somebody who would want one from me. I would be so confused! It's all kind of ridiculous so I definitely understand. Maybe when I have a bit of time over the summer I should research it? It seems pretty intimidating to me.
    But anyway, you are awesome and you look awesome and no wonder people want to work with you! This dress is so pretty. I wish I had one like it!

  28. 14 April 2013 / 20:49

    Fuck expectations πŸ™‚ Doe gewoon wat je graag doet! Hihi πŸ™‚
    en wow van die woorden heb ik ook nog nooit gehoord πŸ˜€

  29. 15 April 2013 / 14:17

    Ik snap wat je bedoelt πŸ™‚ Maar zie het vooral als een compliment dat mensen je vragen om een samenwerking! Dat je nog nergens bent 'gefeatured' is totaal niet erg, dat komt wel, en in de eerste plaats moet je bloggen omdat je het graag doet en niet om dingen te krijgen (da's toch mijn mening) en dat doe je super! you rock!

  30. 16 April 2013 / 17:39

    I am so in love with this look!!!!! Blue and yellow is such a lovely colour combo..so nautical! That dress is beautiful and I love that you paired it with the cardi! Have a great day Nikki xo

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published.

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.